To Do or Not To Do, That is the Question

I love to-do lists.

I have a general one that I update each morning.  No matter how stressful the day ahead, it feels manageable when I see the tasks and deadlines outlined and orderly.  I feel empowered by crossing items from the list, so much so that I always start the list with something I have already completed just for the pleasure of drawing a line through it.

Recently, however, I have been thinking about the things I am not going to do any more.  This brought me to the recollection of a man I met who was going through a divorce.  He said, “It seems like women get into their forties and they just go crazy!”  Hmm.

Seems to me that women get into their forties and become peri-menopausal.  Their estrogen tanks and their testosterone  starts to show off.  Technically, I think that makes women over forty more like men.  Call me crazy.

Truth is we all grow stronger in our convictions as we get older.  I now consider it a privilege, if not a duty, of aging.  Blame it on hormones or life experience.  At some point, we have all we can take and then we take a stand.  We are not so much “set in our ways,” as we are busting loose.

So here are some of the items on my growing not-to-do list:

• I will not buy or wear shoes that hurt my feet no matter how much of a bargain they are or how cute they look.  That goes for pantyhose and blue jeans too.  And anything latex or spandex that causes me to look and feel like a bulging, blocked artery.
• I will not do housekeeping chores when I can visit with my children or join a friend for lunch.
• I will not save another twisty-tie or plastic tab. 
• I will not go back to that store with the consistently, persistently, resistantly terrible check-out service.
• I will not watch reality TV shows that cause me to feel ashamed about being a human being.
• I will not speed.  No matter how many middle fingers an impatient driver may have, unless they are up my nose, it is none of my concern what other drivers do with their hands.
• I will not look at my phone while I am driving.  If you are expecting me, please don’t text me five times to ask where I am minute by minute.  Unless you hear otherwise from the highway patrol, I am on my way.
• I will not buy any clothing that has a tag that says “dry clean only” because I will not live long enough to wear it twice.
• I will not take a pill when there is a good alternative even if it means I must change my behavior.
• I will not force myself to read a whole book or sit through an entire movie if I am not enjoying myself.
• I will not go to the bank to socialize, no matter how much it looks like a coffee shop.
• I will not work for people who brazenly ignore the law or the spirit of the law.
• I will not blindly accept that “there is nothing you can do about it.”
• I will not leave a mess behind at a restaurant, movie theater, or laundromat just because I am a paying customer.  
• I will not invest in any more beauty products.   The ship has sailed.  All I need is sunscreen.
• I will not ignore kindness when it is offered.
  

I could go on, but that would be crazy.

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